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“How do you do that?” I’d ask. I share that mathematic episode not to brag, but to get my point across. The kid was always good at math. So imagine my concern when he came home with a D on his progress report later that year! His mother and I were shocked. A “D.” Why, that’s just a step above failure. “Come up and look at this!” screeched his mother from upstairs when I walked into the house. I knew immediately by the tone of her screech that she wasn’t going to tell me he’d just been elected class president.

“What is it?” I asked, “Just look at his grades!” she bellowed, And there is was, Surrounded by A’s and B’s, a single essie ballet slippers dupe opi D, “What’s this?” I asked, looking the teen-ager directly in the eye, “Uh, it’s my progress report,” he answered, “I mean, what’s this D in math?”, “I believe they call it a grade,” he said sarcastically, “Well, it’s not much of a grade, now is it?” I said, matching his sarcasm..

“Come on, Dad, it’s just a progress report,” he tried to say. “Well, it doesn’t sound like you’re making very much progress,” I snapped. And with that, we made a few changes in his lifestyle (that’s just a fancy way of saying he was grounded). His television and telephone were the first things to go. “And you’re to get your homework done as soon as you get home every night,” said his mom. The television in his room was dark, his telephone silent. And they were to remain that way for the next 12 weeks until the semester grades came out … the grades that really counted.

“I would suggest you work hard and get that grade up to at least a B,” I told him, “Oh, I will,” he promised, “I have plenty of time left; this was just a progress report, Geez, you act like you never essie ballet slippers dupe opi got a D in anything!”, “Hey, this isn’t about me,” I said, trying my best to dodge the question, “It’s about you.”, “Yeah,” he sneered, “well maybe I’ll just call Grandma and ask her.”, “You can’t,” I explained, “You have no phone privileges.”..

Saratoga Village Marketplace: The Saratoga Chamber of Commerce and Saratoga-Monte Sereno Community Foundation present the weekly Wednesday certified Farmers Market in Blaney Plaza. The market features certified local farmers with fresh berries, fruits and produce, as well as fresh fish, other food specialties and handmade crafts from local artisans. Wednesdays, 2:30-6:30 p.m. saratogachamber.org or 408 867-0753. Westhope Senior Activities Center: Come for family-style lunch, Mondays, noon, small donation. Other activities include line dancing, Mondays, 9:30 a.m. All seniors are welcome. Westhope Presbyterian Church, 12850 Saratoga Ave., cross street Cox Avenue.

Saratoga History Museum: Exhibits focusing on local history, Admission and parking are free, Museum is open Friday-Sunday, 1-4 p.m, 20450 Saratoga-Los Gatos Road, 408-867-4311 or saratogahistory.com, Saratoga’s Got Talent: An opportunity for all to share their talent and have a good time, essie ballet slippers dupe opi Live musical performances, dance, karaoke, stand-up comedy and more–just about anything goes, Kids perform the first hour, and adults after, Every month has a different theme, First and third Friday of each month, 7-10:30 p.m, Blue Rock Shoot, 14523 Big Basin Way, Saratoga, Check for event updates at facebook.com/ValleyTalent or subscribe to the email group, groups.google.com/group/ValleyTalent, saratogatalent.com..

Classic rock and pop songs by the likes of Gloria Gaynor, Tina Turner and the Village People will keep heads bobbing and fingers snapping in the audience for Priscilla–there are more than 20 dance-floor faves in all. If that’s not enough, the beyond-fabulous costumes are guaranteed to amaze. Designers Tim Chappel and Lizzy Gardiner won the 2011 Tony Award for best costume design; in 1995 they snagged an Oscar for their work on the movie. (If Gardiner’s name plus the Academy Awards sounds familiar, it’s probably because she infamously wore a dress made of American Express gold cards that evening on the red carpet.).

WASHINGTON — Diane “Dynamite” Clark jabs, shuffling her feet, circling and throwing punches — left, right, uppercut, At 60, Clark punches with such ferocity that an onlooker pulls away, Jab, Jab, Pop, Pop, She’s wearing a pink headband and hot-pink blouse as essie ballet slippers dupe opi she shadowboxes in a community room of a Prince George’s County, Md, homeless shelter, She ducks an imaginary blow, her thick hands curled inside imaginary gloves, her eyes fixed on an imaginary slow-moving target..